Heiderino

Stilts Lady

Originally uploaded by Heiderino.

I had a pretty bad week two weeks ago. My laptop died, and I lost EVERYTHING. I felt crippled without the internet. I went downstairs to use my Powermac G5, and to my horror, it would not boot up either.

Guess what? ALL LOST. BOTH COMPUTERS. SAME WEEK.

I can’t remember my username and password for Heiderino.com, but luckily I had it all set up to blog through Flickr.

As a result, all posts on Heiderino from now on will contain a photo.

This photo is of a lady who walks on stilts all over town. She was at Al’s Run in Milwaukee on Saturday.

I saw a commercial today for the “new and improved” Swiffer. Despite the convincing, smiling face of the woman who so nimbly danced around, removing dust in a snap, I didn’t really notice what these improvements are.

Just when I thought the commercial was ending, they flashed in with an ad-within-an-ad - for the new Swiffer that is also a vacuum.

I kind of thought that they were done with that Carpet Flick thing, which I think is a big sticker at the end of the swiffer stick, to lift fuzz and crumbs off of your carpet without actually vacuuming.

Thor’s grandma is in the hospital. Luckily, they feel that her problem is under control, but she’ll be there probably one more night.

I told Drue that Great-Grandma is in the hospital, and that we were going to call her.

Drue: (With excitement) “Great-Grandma’s having a BABY?”

I’m impressed and pleased by the group of stars who placed the advertisements supporting the war on terror.

Everyone please think positive thoughts and say some prayers for the safe return of Steve Centanni and Olaf Wiig of Fox News.

I heard of these kidnappings almost immediately after they happened, but the identities of the victims were not immediately released. Steve and Oleg were referred to as “Two of our associates” on the breaking news, and my initial instinct was to think these people were behind-the-scenes employees of the network (Oleg is a camera man), perhaps from other countries. (Oleg is a New Zealand citizen.)

About 15 minutes ago, I saw a brief news flash about this, and found out who they are. I am in shock!

When you watch a news channel daily, as I do, you kind of start to feel like you know the regular personalities…

Positive thoughts… Positive thoughts…

It’s 8:45 and I realized I missed almost the entire first hour of the Lifetime Original Movie tonight.

At least I know that it will be on at least six more times in the coming month, and I’m guessing that the man is the enemy. Well, that, or the woman is evil and uses the man to achieve some sinister goal, like killing her husband or bamboozling him out of millions.

Yep - I think that just about covers it.

When YOU are the one going down your neighbor’s deck stairs in slow motion… Rolling and *almost* catching yourself step-by-step, straining your ankle and wrist… Bruising your tush… Knowing your neighbor is in the kitchen window, witnessing this demise, and trying not to laugh all the while.

Apply directly to the forehead! Head on! Apply directly to the forehead!

As if this commercial weren’t annoying enough, why did they have to come out with “Freedhem?”

Freedom from Hemorrhoids? Freedhem! Freedom from Hemorrhoids? Freedhem!

At least they don’t go as far as to say: “Apply directly to the…”

I’m not happy to hear that my favorite news personality Shepard Smith is over in Lebanon, dodging rockets.

Rookie journalists are made to stand on the shore during hurricanes, with their goggles and hats blowing off, staggering around while trying to shout “As… you can see… WHOA! Very… Windy here…” They get paid next to nothing, and work insane hours.

After they claw their way up the journalistic totem pole, they get rewarded with fame, prime time, good pay and… ROCKET DODGING!

Water disguised as booze

“No, really - it’s water!”

This is the most unique design for bottled water I’ve seen yet.

I suppose there isn’t much more to say about it, except for the fact that it isn’t only visually intriguing, but extremely practical for wedging between ketchup and mustard bottles in the fridge door.

You might get some strange looks at the office if you pulled this out during a meeting, but I’d say it’s worth a try. I think I will do that tomorrow.